The Bottom 10 of 2001
The following is a list of some of the films that I just couldn’t enjoy in 2001. Sure the Junior Mints were good and the popcorn hit the spot, but despite all of that I just couldn’t enjoy any of these films for a variety of reasons. There may have been other films the were worthy of making this list, but this is simply based on what I saw during the year (Approx. 115 films)
There were some films that were in competition for a spot on the list but barely got edged out. Pokemon 3, Down to Earth and Scary Movie 2 were all close, but lost out at the last minute to some “better” films. Now on to the big list, these are the films that I just couldn’t stomach for one reason or another.
10. Driven -- I am a race fan. I grew up watching CART races with my favorite driver Rick Mears battling Gordon Johncock, AJ Foyt, Mario and Michael Andretti and so on. This movie tries to be Days of Thunder for the open wheel racing folks and unfortunately it gets bogged down in some bad dialogue and plot lines. Sure some of the visuals are extremely cool, but overall this was a big disappointment.
9. 3000 Miles to Graceland – A film starring Kevin Costner, Kurt Russell, Christian Slater and Courtney Cox can’t be that bad can it? Of course it can. This was a very painful film to watch. The violence was extremely over the top and it just didn’t get better as the film went on. This film ends in one of the most violent scenes I can remember in recent mainstream film.
8. On The Line – Lance Bass is a world-renowned megastar, just not for his acting. This is a sugary sweet romance that just is mostly a muddled mess (for most adults). It was painful to watch the *NSYNC star go through this film trying to be old enough to be caught up in the dating scene that he is in, but yet play young enough so that the audience the film is geared to is still in the loop. It only makes number 8 though, as there were a couple positives to the film. Joey Fatone actually could be a decent sidekick, given the right script. And the film DOES play well to the 8-13 year old girls that it is geared to.
7. Advetures of Joe Dirt – WOW. Now I will be the first to admit that I generally like very stupid humor. David Spade is a character that can crack me up in so many ways. Joe Dirt, however, just cannot hold a candle to some of his films that he paired with Chris Farley. Spade has a neat concept with Joe Dirt, and it has a fun soundtrack to it. But so much of the film seems so out of place. Dennis Miller adds to the mess in his role as the DJ that is interested in Joe’s life story.
6. Glitter – In most years this film would hover near the top of the list. 2001 had some films that were even worse though. As I said in the full review of the film, Mariah Carey has a good voice, and is attractive but film is NOT here strong suit. This awkward story is filled with some of the worst dialogue and uncomfortable settings of any film this year. Unfortunately, Carey didn’t realize that here audience was younger than the PG-13 rating this film carried and tried to be too grown up with much of the film. I can’t recommend this one to anyone.
5. Saving Silverman -- This film has a real nice cast of characters. Jack Black, Jason Biggs, Steve Zahn, Amanda Peet and Amanda Detmer to name a few. But it was just incredibly unfunny. I waited, hoped, and begged this film to make me laugh, but all it could muster was an occasional chuckle and no genuine laughter.
4. Pootie Tang – Ok, so given the title of this film I couldn’t expect a whole lot going into it, but this made a beeline onto the bottom 10 of the year. The whole film plot, dialogue, comedy, acting, and everything else was just incomprehensible. Pootie’s dialogue garnered a chuckle for the first time or two, but to make it into an entire 1 hour 22 minute feature film??? PLEASE!!! And to think, I generally find Chris Rock very funny, but this just wasn’t for me.
3. Bubble Boy – This is the first, of three VERY painful films that make up the worst 3 movies of 2001. I had to sit through this film and I kept repeating to myself…”It’s gotta get better”. Boy was I wrong. The jokes in this film made fun of everything and everyone and were truly offensive at times. Whoever thought a story about a boy in a bubble going cross-country might be funny, was sadly mistaken. This film was simply offensive and crude.
2. Tomcats – While bubble boy went to be offensive to everyone and everything, Tomcats just wanted to be one of the most sexually oriented offensive films around. Congratulations to the cast on this one; it worked. Tomcats was just unfunny and overtly rude. Sure, I’m a guy and I like to see a movie that features Shannon Elizabeth and Jamie Pressley in a movie. I would, however, like something about the film to be enjoyable and not painful. Tomcats doesn’t work on more levels than one can imagine.
1. Freddy Got Fingered – When you mention the word painful this film comes to mind. I just do not understand how anyone could let this film get made. What is funny about Tom Green pleasuring a number of animals? What is funny about Tom Green swinging a newborn baby around by its umbilical cord? What is funny about this movie? NOTHING. I couldn’t even find a way to manage more than a chuckle until the end of the movie when there was a sign in the crowd that stated “when will this (expletive deleted) movie end.” Not soon enough! This movie is genuinely the worst movie of this new century and lets hope it doesn’t get much worse than this!
Well…there ya have it. A list that isn’t perfect, and sure there may be some other films that could have made this list but didn’t. Of course you may like some of these films, and in some cases I can understand, that’s what makes the movies fun. Each of us has a different level of tastes and these are just mine. I welcome all comments and questions on this list, and I really would like someone to make a case for what made Freddy Got Fingered any good.